please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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