You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Randomize
