fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
