you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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