I want to stick my p in your. b.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize