Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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