If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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