He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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