just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize