it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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