I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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