You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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