I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
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