Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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