you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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