btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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