My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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