I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
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