Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky