If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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