I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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