we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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