Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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