So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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