Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize
