In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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