you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
