dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
