dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
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In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
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In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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