There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
