So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
