I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
