Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
