i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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