I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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