they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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