We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
