it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Randomize
