I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize