So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
