I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
