im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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