If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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