he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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