New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
