I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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