so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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