I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Randomize