I swear she didn't look like that last week.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
New Dating App in Dallas For Only The Most Ambitious and Attractive Singles
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"