You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
